Thought this is a Beautiful Picture I wanna share with all of you :)
It describes how My heart feels. Setting amongst the clouds, forming rays spreading out. At least the feeling describes it. Sun shine days seems to be over. The sun is coming down on me.
Nope, I am not sad or whatsoever. It's juz that going thru an emotional burden inside my heart that I am trying to know. I fear. Fear I can't give my all to another relationship. Fear to give my all to commitment. Fear to Love again. Because of this Psychological Setback running through my mind, I fear to move on. Always telling myself again & again: I can only love once. I am devoted. I can't forget.
Wonder how people define LOVE. Do they really mean it? Does he really mean it? Does he know what's LOVE all about? Can it be acquired without going thru a relationship but juz out of admiration from a distance?
Relationshiphoblic - A term I juz made it up in less than a min. It juz simply means Relationship Phobia. Yaps, U told me not to think so much. I can't help it. Mind synchronizing with the heart. Finally the mind took control. For the better or the worse? Heart becomes cold-hearted, frozen. Mind become logical and thinking far: Goals? Compatibility? Demands? Freedom? Money? Career?
My dearest friend, Elaine says I am strong. I can be cool about break-ups and getting hurt. Ya manz... How come? I've hurt someone and I can even laugh it out. I thought I am pretty serious about 'LOVE' and about 'Commitment'? I can be loyal but Do I really love the person? Maybe not. Then why start in the first place?
Deafening. I can barely hear the heartbeat that I feel when I love someone - I thought I did. Dumbness. I can barely speak out loving words, type out words that could make someone so happy - words coming out because I mean it and typing out because U know U do feel this way. Blind-fold - Like walking through a journey without watching the steps. The blind leading the blind. No purpose & juz following. Following the norm, the flow... Can't see the sunshine but can feel the heat.
Overall, losing the senses beyond control.
My friends say "SELFISH" and I juz wanna be loved. I do feel for that someone but I juz dun feel the urge to do anything or be with that someone. Have or not doesn't make a difference. Like a companionship perphaps. Friends can do it as well isn't it? I see my friends loving so deeply, so dearly, so whole-heartedly. reminds me of the past when I did but I juz can't find back the feeling I used to look forward.
Maybe he's gone that's Why? He forgot to return my heart?
Can someone Teach me how to love someone again? And I hereby emphasizing using the .............HEart..............
A rainbow to end my day
2:16 AM
Songs of Rainbow
Lynette is the composer of her life
Someday I will find it
Scorpion
23 years of laughter
Driven by hopes, Love and Dreams
Want an exciting Life, daring & bold
