Nope, I am not going to talk about martin luther king's inspiring speech that was remembered by all.
MY DREAM.
I had a dream yesterday....
amazingly real nonono, it's not wet dream(dirty minded u!)
I was in this big house with children around me. I was a mother embracing a baby. there's a man (no, can't c his face) Is he my husband? I don't know...
is this dream getting anywhere?
then I looked out of the window, it faces a beautiful lake with mountains in the background. nostalgic sight. Ok.. I am not writing a novel or some story.
But that was what I wanted to be when I was a young girl. other inspired to be someone. I wanted to be a housewife. then I wanted to be a career woman. I change again. I decide to be a tai tai but I don't know mahjong so I think I wanna be a housewife with a maid with kids and dogs. (sucker for kids and dogs)
cool eh..
Then the question popped, "what the future lies ahead of me?"
Recently, Kaiquan discussed about it over lunch. "how successful you think you are?"
it was about his situation that people think he's UP THERE (pui..hehe) but compared with OTHERS, he dun think so. comparing is never-end. there's always a higher mountain. then I thought, it's how contented you feel you are in. how satisfied you are with your life.
suddenly, we talked about johari window click on it to know more.
"open" - how well do you know about yourself and others know of u? "blind" - what do others know of you but hidden to urself? "hidden" - what others don't know about you but only known to urself? "unknown" - what you and the others don't know about urself?
interesting theory with no explicit answer. My self-esteem is quite high. I remembered when I was young, I was super confident and cocky even. My parents always ask me how's my exams after taking it. I will say, "GOOD! SURE PASS"
BUT it's either fail or borderline.
where's my DISCLOSURE? do I disclose what I feel? chances I don't. (yea, now you know I am a 2-faced snake)
grr.... dunno, still self-discover-ing
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the other event that made me want to self-reflect is because I went to sign up for this retail scholarship.
yaya, smart aleck. I don't even know how much I want it!
hect, get then say.
went through grilling rounds then I realised, I do want it but I don't NEED it. Scholarship, as good as it may sounds. The name that bears in your resume forever!
IKEA chose me for the last selection round. swedish meatballs - endless supply!
my classmates who also went through are all very nice and equally strong candidates. I am glad to meet people and interacted with them in this process. You have no idea how much I admire these guys.
then, what if I get it? "do I really want it?"
opportunity costs. monetary and non-monetary. how about the TIME & ENERGY spend getting this PAIN-STAKING degree. (OEI! NOT EASY HOR...SWEATED) my passion thwart?
Banking? nahz no good with finance. Money is good though advertising? Love it but money no good retail? 2nd love but money no good hospitality? 3rd love but money not worth the time spent stat board? forget about climbing but work/life balance research? KILL ME. consultancy? Nahz, no grades. haha tai tai? SURE WILL! SHOW ME THE MONEY, SHAKE LEGS, SHOP TIL U DROP
ok before people start shooting me of my misconception about these industries, I wanna stand by.... these are EXCUSES.
I have no religion but let GOD decide. if I do get the scholarship, I will take it. 2 yrs later then decide my ultimate fate. 3/4 of your life to work & slog, better have a GOOD decision.
I am going to netherlands, University of Maastricht for exchange from feb - june it's like my grad trip travelling around europe. it's a stone away from germany and belgium. I will miss you all. I will be good (YES! DON'T DOUBT ME)
I am happy to declare that I am an exchange FREAKO!
Exchange to Shanghai for global summer studies. Exchange to SMU for local SUSEP. Now this.
GIP i've yet to conquer.
too bad.
Alot of things to do. so bothersome. just bOOked accomodation. Applied to the university. passport fotos. transcript visa flight expenses
problems flying in and out. SICK pray to temple to bless me (AMITABA...)
RANDOM: facebook astrology daily readings is really super accurate! REALLY... scary...
alrite I feel better now.
Time to get some rest
lol. who will even read to THIS END.
thanks for the patience.
if you have not joined facebook, please do.
NEXT RANDOM: happy birthday to ELAINE!
last but not least, may all my problems be gone with the wind.
everyone, be happy :D
smile because tomorrow will be BETTER NOT WORSE (BERNARD TAKE NOTE)
peaceout! I LOVE PEOPLE LIKE mu,fi,ef,pa,ke,am,ci,da,sh,be,el,ke,ry,kq,ch,va,va,fi,da,zx,xy,pa,xu,ma
they MADE a difference to my life and amazingly admired by me :D
in random order, initials that represent each person so if you do see your initial, you know you are loved by me.<3
ciaoz.....
exams coming!!!! *PULL HAIR*
LAST RANDOM: picture of me
A rainbow to end my day
12:46 PM
Songs of Rainbow
Lynette is the composer of her life
Someday I will find it
Scorpion
23 years of laughter
Driven by hopes, Love and Dreams
Want an exciting Life, daring & bold
